GROSS
NOPE. HAVEN'T TOUCHED HER! File this under G for Gross. Tom Cruise is afraid to lay his hands on a naked Katie Holmes, for fear he might hurt his unborn alien baby. The lobster claws are not yet formed and the cone head is just beginning to protrude- the act of lovemaking may cause irreparable damage to the spawn. Imagine if the green horns don’t fully develop? Now that would be embarrassing for the parents. How would the child ever be granted a trip to the Galactic Confederacy?
El Ron Hubbard warned of complications if a couple dared to have sex during pregnancy. From his grave he called out to Tom NOT to touch Katie. He may however, perform special rituals, clear her thetans, administer an emeter and plug her up with those anal probes I'm so fond of.
Tom has decided not to so much as look at Katies growing/shrinking belly, at least until baby Elrondo is born in a silent entry into this world. Is there a certain level of comfort in the knowledge that Tom and Katie aren’t doing it? Honestly, they probably never engaged in “relations” especially considering she is carrying the baby of the guy who runs the whole Scientology freak show and is Tom’s best buddy.
posted by Cindy @ 5:47 AM
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15 Comments:
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Anonymous said...
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oddly enough a gay man would not want to touch a naked female either. interesting how that correlation works. @ 6:38 AM GMT
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Anonymous said...
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Tom doesn't quite look like himself in this picture. Do I smell plastic surgery? @ 7:32 AM GMT
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ffleur said...
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Once, out of curiousity, I asked my favorite bookseller for a copy of "Dianetics". They had exactly ONE copy, yeah its so popular.
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Anonymous said...
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Agree Anon 2:23 - what's up with his face? It does look like he's gone under the knife. Does Rosemary think she'll ever have (simulated) sex with him again? If she does, she is really brainwashed. Scary. @ 10:56 AM GMT
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Anonymous said...
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Congratulations to Mr. Run-into-the-Wind for his Razzie nomination for worst actor in War of the Worlds. I expect he'll win. @ 12:49 PM GMT
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Anonymous said...
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I guess Katie will be perpetually pregnant so he doesn't have to have sex with her.
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lauritajuanitasanchez said...
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Tom thinks that cha chas are gross. I hear he prefers hoo-hoos. @ 4:20 PM GMT
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Anonymous said...
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Does he have a wedding ring on? @ 7:13 PM GMT
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Anonymous said...
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I agree, Anon 2:32 - he looks different in that photo. Maybe it's weight loss from all that morning sickness. :) @ 7:49 PM GMT
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Anonymous said...
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looks to me like he's got a case of those same freaky shiny red hands that poor little Miss Nicole always has....maybe it's a Scientology thing?? although his face is really just-got-lasered or exfoliated shiny & red too....hmmmmmmmm @ 12:57 AM GMT
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Anonymous said...
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He's never touched her sexually before, now he doesn't have to since he has an "excuse."
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Anonymous said...
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The teeth look way bigger than usual and the brow/forehead area is looking a little weird. Methinks capped teeth and some botox? He has lost weight though.
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ballerinamommy said...
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As much as I'm dying to know the "real" story of these two, I know that we will never know the whole truth. They're like a train wreck that we can't stop watching. I'm fascinated, yet sickened at the same time. I could go on and on........ @ 1:57 PM GMT
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Anonymous said...
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The shiny red's from a niacin overdose.
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Anonymous said...
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I can't stop repeating the word "Elrondo"......LMAO!!!! @ 2:49 AM GMT
Post a Comment | << HomeWell after seating myself comfortably, I discovered it reads like stereo instructions. Absolutely inscrutable. I returned it to the seller, unpurchased, and they stored it back in its hiding place (where I'm sure it still sits, collecting dust).
If that is the bible TC follows, I'm not surprised about his codswollop with sexual activity. Everyone knows you can do it until the last month and even then, if careful. Hell, people even do it to stiumulate labour if the baby is overdue.
I'm sure his gay nature is overjoyed to find a scieno reason why he doesn't have to touch her. @ 8:22 AM GMT
BTW, I notice from recent pictures she doesn't look like she's gotten any bigger since last month. Forgot to upgrade the belly suit, huh? @ 1:58 PM GMT
Is she ever going to have that kid? Didn't she get pregnant in like May or something? @ 1:39 AM GMT
Lookin' super strange! @ 4:38 AM GMT
It's supposed to be theraputic or something.
Freaks. @ 5:07 AM GMT