A wise move: Star gets fired and the world rejoices!
In a ridiculous move, those E! executives took a dump all over Kathy Griffin and fired her from the E! Red Carpet pre-show replacing her with smiley robot with the coiffed hair, Ryan Seacrest.
The ink is still drying on the seven figure contract Ryan just signed with E! He will be the lead anchor on E! news and will also develop a new series for the network. He will begin with the series called, Me and My Hair followed by an in-depth report on the basics of tooth whitening and Mystic tanning. Watch and learn. I offered my services to the E! channel and suggested they follow me in my quest to be a centerfold in Beaver Hunt but they turned me down. I would have worked the Red Carpet for less than seven figures- try high sixes- but no luck.
I was doing a Michael Flately jig in my clogs when Star announced couldn’t fulfill her duties as Red Carpet anchor. Those emails we sent really worked, you guys! Nevermind that her book is as interesting as reading the AARP newsletter but she is saying she has a demanding book tour this year and cannot commit to her hosting duties. Really? Its not because she sucked? Its odd that she is still requesting the goodie bags from the events.
It took a team of paramedics, some smelling salts and a bottle of Hornita tequila to resuscitate me when I was given the news of Kathy leaving the network. Why? I cried out, WHY?
Kathy explains it in a riddle: "Apparently Ted told my reps that the E! red carpet is a puzzle and I am a piece of the puzzle, which is a wonderful puzzle piece, but I don't fit this particular puzzle and that when I see the puzzle, I will get it. I am a piece that doesn't understand only because they can't tell me who will take over.”