Monday, June 6
Prolonged viewing may incur vomiting, heart palpitations, anal leakage and swelling of testicles.
Paramount is paying serious attention to dumping eccentric maniac Tom Cruise whose
high- on- scientology demeanor is not going over well while promoting War of the Worlds. Mind you, this is not for certain but words are being exchanged about cutting Tom loose from Mission Impossible 3.
They want to ditch him, not because of his over the top obsession with Katie "cold sores" Holmes, but because his freaky declarations of love for e-meters and proclivity for setting up a scientology tent in front of the movie set is just, well...it's weird. People prefer massage chairs and latte kiosks. Tom is garnering negative attention and doing damage to his box office draw because of his strange ways. I told you he's a freak and a closeted homo and no one was believing me. Hello!
In related news, Brooke Sheilds is so pissed off about Tom poking his big honker into her post partum troubles that she said she wouldn't take advice from someone who believes in aliens. But was she referring to Tom or John Travolta who made the erroneous mistake of actually starring in Battlefield Earth?
Brooke is currently starring in the London musical, Chicago and offered an olive branch to Tommy. She said, "If he wants to see Chicago, I've left him two tickets - one adult, one child."
Oops. That wasn't gesture of peace and love, that was a mean swipe at the sixteen year age difference between Tom and his PR dream, Katie Holmes. Meow!
Grab your vodkatinis. It's time to chat!
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