Conversations about Famous People

Sunday, March 6

Me n' Kev, we's been married five whole munts! Let's see, we gotted married in September, how many is that, y'all? I don't know! I don't have to count, thats what I got Kev for! He's so smart. He can chew Skoal and smoke cigarettes at the same time as putting his pants on. Hands off, y'all. He's mine!

Listen. I got a real hot tip for all you ladies. When you wear a see-thru top like the one I's got on, y'all should wear a real lacey bra underneath so people can see it! And low cut shirts are real cute, like Kev loves it when I wear a low cut shirt. He likes to look at mah boobies. Then he's all, "Shut up, ho. I'm playin' my PlayStation2." and I'm like, "Oh Kev, you is so cute!"

He's coming out with a new rap album, y'all. I was hoping to git BitBit to sing back up on it, how fun! Like, yeah! And y'all, I got to tell you I dyed mah hair 'cuz we's gonna have that baby and mah mama said I can't color mah hair when I'm pregnant. So I's like, well, I'll just dye it brown.
Me and Jamie Lynn, we colored mah hair in the bathroom at the Shell station. Y'all don't worry, I kept mah shoes on this time!

Well, I gots to go now. Me and Kev, we's gettin' fried chicken and tater salad. See y'all later!

10 Comments:

Rio Alvaria said...: Oh, dear. Britney, dearest, when walking in certain parts of Detroit or Compton, *do* try and keep that hand down, won't you? Don't let Cletus' whitey-gangsta look rub off on you, or the Crips and Bloods are going to reconcile their 30-year differences and collectively laugh their asses off at you. @ 9:33 PM GMT
Anonymous said...: Is it me or is Titney's English getting worse? @ 2:35 AM GMT
Anonymous said...: "911, what is your emergency?"
Yes, I'd like to report a crime-send stylists, hair, wardrobe,make-up, birth control and a divorce lawyer,it's Mrs. Federline again, we need an intervention. @ 1:16 PM GMT
Anonymous said...: This is not Britney, I don't believe it! @ 5:21 PM GMT
Esther said...: The word 'BLECCCH!' comes to mind. @ 8:58 PM GMT
Anonymous said...: The words boring and pathetic women who apparently have nothing interesting to say or do ..those come to mind, as well. @ 3:28 AM GMT
Anonymous said...: Is she about to go dumpster-diving? @ 9:07 AM GMT
Anonymous said...: I take that back. I think has to be a post-dumpster shot, at Walmart. @ 9:09 AM GMT
bikipatra said...: every day, the skin under her chin becomes a bit plumper...must be the pork rinds. @ 1:20 PM GMT
Anonymous said...: Are you really Britney Spears or are you a fan or do u like work with her or sumthin? @ 6:13 AM GMT