Tuesday, January 25
Jeff Foxworthy would be so proud! YOU MIGHT BE A REDNECK if you wear an ugly hat with a hideous scarf around it and leave your shirt unbuttoned. But who is he kidding? Kid Rock aint no redneck. He's a wealthy guy brought up in upper class Detroit!
Right now, do you think Britney Spears is looking at Kid Rock saying, "Y'all, I like totally messed up. Kid Rock is like, such a hottie. I shoulda held out for him with his long hair and his little paunchy tummy. Dang Cletus! Gimme another bag'a Cheetos!"
For goodness sake, Bob Richie, button your darn shirt and tuck that shizzle into your pants! The only acceptable reason to leave your shirt wide open is if you have like, totally hard abs, Im talking a nice rippling six pack, not...like what you have which I like to call a party keg belly.
And you do have one thing in common with Kevin Federline. You both are in need of a facial hair stylist. Ever hear of something called a Razor? Let me send you my Sally Hansen Wax strips and just follow the directions on the side of the box. Oh, and how could I forget? Long, thin hair is never a good look for a guy approaching middle age. Thats not even a mullet. Thats like an ...ullet. Get it cut, homeslice!
Grab your vodkatinis. It's time to chat!
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